As women, many of us tend to apologize too much. We say “I’m sorry” when someone bangs into us, takes our seat, steps on our toe, or when we upset a person with our difference of opinion. “I’m sorry” comes out of our mouths too often before we even think of an alternative. When is an apology called for and when is it unnecessary? Here are 10 things to stop apologizing for.
Never say “I’m sorry” for…
1. Expressing how you feel. You are entitled to your emotions, whether someone understands them or not. It’s brave to speak up when you’re hurting and when someone tells you that you’re “overly-emotional” or “overreacting.” They are telling you they aren’t prepared to listen to how you’re feeling or support you.
2. Setting high expectations. You can always ask for better. If something or someone consistently falls short, you should always speak up when you a colleague doesn’t step up, or you feel a relationship is lacking. You do not have to exist in a relationship which feels one-sided, say “I’m sorry” when you feel disappointed, or stand for being poorly treated when you know you are worth much more.
3. Following your dreams. Never say you’re sorry for your career aspirations. You are fully entitled to create the journey you choose to achieve your vision. Don’t fall into a guilt trip if your family or partner is consistently putting you and your dreams down, or telling you that you might as well give up. You will never fulfill your happiness unless you live your dreams instead of just dreaming about them.
4. Deciding how you choose to live. You own your body and what you decide to do with it. This includes exercising, what you eat, where you live, and the ways you spend your money or your time. If you have a problem where you could use some support, it might be helpful to hear someone’s feedback. However, even in that case, it’s your decision.
5. Wanting space and holding to your boundaries. You are fully entitled to take some alone-time for things that are important to you. You don’t have to explain your need for space, even when you are in a relationship. If you are tired and not in the mood for sex, you don’t have to explain, no matter the reason. Your boundaries and limitations are your own and contribute to your self-respect. Saying “no” doesn’t require an apology.
6. Taking “me” time. You must take time off, time to relax, and enjoy time for yourself. Your ability to navigate work and life so it works for you helps your success and feeds your joy. Always take care of your needs and take enough “me time” to do what brings you happiness.
7. Standing for your values and priorities. Don’t permit yourself to feel guilty about your preferences. If it’s important to you, then treat your priorities as essential. Always take care of your priorities first. Stay confident that your real friends, trusted colleagues, and supportive family members will respect you and your choices.
8. Ending a toxic relationship. Never apologize for letting go of a person who is not right for you, whether they are dates, life partners, bosses, colleagues, or “friends.” You deserve a positive relationship rather than holding yourself back from reaching your full potential. Surround yourself with people who support you and your decisions about relationships.
9. Not knowing the right answer. Asking questions, even when you think you know the answer, is the way we learn. Never say you’re sorry because you don’t know or have the correct answer. Stand
proud that you dare to ask and are authentic in your humility when presented with an opportunity to learn.
10. Making a passionate argument. Speaking up for your point of view takes courage and sometimes some risk-taking. If you have a belief and passionately feel your opinion should be voiced, don’t say “I’m sorry.” It robs you of the influence and energy that brings forth inspiration to others.
Stop apologizing when it’s unnecessary. Be true to who you are, and don’t go overboard about what other people think. Never apologize for being strong. Over-apologizing or saying “I’m sorry” when it’s not necessary reduces self-esteem over time. Save the “I’m sorry” for when you actually make a mistake.
This entry was posted on Tuesday, May 31st, 2022 at 7:06 am
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